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Should you conduct a background investigation?

At DateSmart, we feel the best way to determine if you need to conduct a background check is for you to ask yourself some questions. Most people conduct a background check after a few dates and if they are considering becoming more involved in the relationship. Many times, they've already seen a Red Flag.

We cannot attempt to answer all of your questions and concerns on this web site, but hope that it helps you to decide what actions should be taken. Here, we share a few specific questions that may raise a red flag for you, or assist you in knowing what questions to ask.

Working personally and confidentially with you, we tailor searches to address your needs. Usually, we ask that you provide some details about your relationship via e-mail or by phone, so we may best assist you. We help you put the pieces together, resolve your concerns and help you make your decisions.

Gentlemen. Is she a spend-thrift? Does she usually have a problem that she needs your help with? How many times has she been married ? What happened to those husbands? Where do they live? Are they deceased? - how did it happen? Does she have a good relationship with her family? How long has she lived at her current residence? Where did she live previously? Why did she move?

Ladies: Is he still married? Is he having financial difficulties? Does he blame his "ex" or a business partner for his financial problems? Did he tell you he's in the CIA or other "top secret" branch of government? Does he seem like a dream come true? Has he told you he'll pay you back if you can "take care of this expense"? Has he asked you for a loan until his funds come in or the business deal goes through?

You met them on the Net, through a dating service or personal ad.

Have they told you that they Love You?, they want to get married? They've never met anyone "quite like you"? You're the only one they're corresponding with (romantically-speaking) in chat or by e-mail? - they "dumped" everyone else? Do you know their physical address? Have they sent you a photograph? How do you know the photo is really of them? Do you plan to travel to meet them? Do they want to travel to visit you?

You met them through a friend, acquaintance, or at a social gathering. Do they seem to be charming, beautiful, well educated, a professional and financially secure?

Subject's age 24-36

• Subject is Male: Is he still a student? Is he employed? How long has he lived at his current address? When you're talking on the phone or chatting on-line, does he have to hang up so his "mother", "roommate" or "friend" can use the line?
  
• Subject is Female: Does she seem to be hiding something? Has she been married before? Does she have minor children? Does she need your help? Do you know her occupation?

Subject's age 37-45

• Subject is Male: Does he travel a considerable amount of time for "business"? Do you need to reach him on the phone at the office, cell phone or on a pager? Have you been to his place?
  
• Subject is Female: Are you in a long-distance relationship? Has she been "hurt" before in a relationship? Is she unwilling to make a commitment?

You're both at least 46 years of age.

Are you financially secure? Do you own a home, property or business, have assets? Have you recently ended a close romantic relationship? Has your life-long partner recently passed away? Do your children and friends approve of your new relationship? Do you feel you've found your perfect mate? How much time do you have to waste?

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